The Heaviest Element Known to Science
Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science.
The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant
neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving
it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast
quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.
Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be
detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into
contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would
normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to
complete.
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years.
It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a
portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.
In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each
reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming
isodopes.
This characteristic of morons promotion leads some
scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons
reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred
to as critical morass.
When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as
much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice
as many morons.
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Subject: Heavy Metal-Heavy Elements-Science Explains 
Sat Feb 14, 2009 10:47 am
