Help! I'm Being Forced to Watch a Musical!!!

alldatndensum wrote:

Quote :

 I almost didn't post this here because I didn't want it to look like I was bashing on my wife (I actually kind of regret saying anything here to be honest).

You need a place to vent without saying anything you'd regret to your wife.  This should be a safe space.  I vent here about things so I don't say or do the wrong thing in real life.  Sometimes I can vent and see on my own how far I have my head stuck up my own rear end without you guys and girls even having to tell me.  Even then, I appreciate the counsel I get from everyone here.  I am betting you feel the same, Gary.

  That is exactly why I didn’t post this on facebook.  Quite frankly I didn’t want to hurt my wife by letting her know exactly how much this had bummed me out.  If I had posted any of this on facebook she would have been devastated, especially with all her family members seeing it.  So I very much appreciate that about our community here.

I do enjoy getting feedback, but I get the feeling (especially with this post) that I didn't make myself understood very well.  Either it's something limiting with trying to communicate feelings and emotion with just the written word...or else I'm horrible at it.  When I get feedback that seems to miss the mark of what I'm trying to convey, it leaves me feeling worse than if I just hadn't said anything.  Maybe it's just borderline depression and I need to see a therapist.  Maybe I just need to shut up and not look for help/answers/encouragement from such a limited format as a message board.  Like you mentioned in the Random Ramblings thread Chris, you never know how someone is going to take what you say or write.
It's like I'm just really bad at understanding people's intentions (and getting them to understand mine) in this format.  At some point I just get discouraged by that process and kind of wish I hadn't said anything.  Often times I resort to humor as a way to relieve the pain.  Sometimes just because I want to be funny.  But I can't expect anyone to be able to tell the difference...at least not on a message board.


Thank you everyone for your input, I do appreciate it. 

I totally understand.  I use a lot of humor just to keep from getting too close as I feel like a real relationship is gonna go sideways for me anyway.  At least most people like a funny guy.

Staybrite wrote:

Quite frankly I wouldn't want to go see Tommy or The Wall either.....I just hate musicals regardless of the type of music.

Got it. You're just a wife basher.

Staying Brite, Staying Brite, hoo hoo hoo hoo, Staying Brite wrote:

The end result is that she told me she is never going to surprise me with anything again. 

THIS is the reason I hate going there with my other half. Many times I opened up and spoke my mind on something that I wasn't pleased with or downright angry with, and got a response of "oh, well, don't worry about that happening cuz I just won't do ANYTHING anymore" - a total over-reaction that is not what I was seeking with my honesty. Very frustrating.

All of Dat wrote:

You need a place to vent without saying anything you'd regret to your wife.  This should be a safe space. 

I for one am SO thankful for CHM, for many reasons, but this is a big one. I've always felt comfortable around all of you in sharing my emotions and either crying on your shoulders or venting about something. The therapy and catharsis of getting it all out for ya'all to read has been amazing and has gotten me thru some SUPER difficult times. I really don't know what I would've even done had I not had my CHM family to turn to. 

The One Who Stays Brite wrote:

When I get feedback that seems to miss the mark of what I'm trying to convey, it leaves me feeling worse than if I just hadn't said anything.

I hope I didn't make any comments that were misunderstanding of your intentions. I tend to do that sometimes and inadvertently upset people. I love ya brother and feel bad when you're upset like this.
I understand borderline depression and disagree that you should just "shut up". Refer to my comment right below Alldat's statement, this is truly a great place (cuz of the broken, imperfect yet redeemed brothers and sisters here) a place to open up and get it out. From multiple personal experiences, we men MUST open up and share with each other. God breathed the inspired phrase "Iron sharpens Iron", and the MANY times I've been in a bad place and shared here at CHM, I was blessed so much to have an audience who cared, to get feedback, to be edified, and in some cases to be corrected - which I needed. So never feel like you can't, shouldn't, or just won't share here with us, your family who cares for ya. Mmmm K ?

topshot rhit wrote:

Staybrite wrote:

Quite frankly I wouldn't want to go see Tommy or The Wall either.....I just hate musicals regardless of the type of music.

Got it. You're just a wife basher.

Ok, that gave me a serious chuckle. 

alldatndensum wrote:

I totally understand.  I use a lot of humor just to keep from getting too close as I feel like a real relationship is gonna go sideways for me anyway.  At least most people like a funny guy.

Guilty/Forgiven wrote:

All of Dat wrote:

You need a place to vent without saying anything you'd regret to your wife.  This should be a safe space. 

I for one am SO thankful for CHM, for many reasons, but this is a big one. I've always felt comfortable around all of you in sharing my emotions and either crying on your shoulders or venting about something. The therapy and catharsis of getting it all out for ya'all to read has been amazing and has gotten me thru some SUPER difficult times. I really don't know what I would've even done had I not had my CHM family to turn to. 

Thanks guys, I guess we really are kind of like the island of misfit toys around here, it's great to have other odd toys to call my family.

(and yes I saw what you did with my name there G/F....very clever...now STOP IT!  )

Guilty/Forgiven wrote:

Staying Brite, Staying Brite, hoo hoo hoo hoo, Staying Brite wrote:

The end result is that she told me she is never going to surprise me with anything again. 

THIS is the reason I hate going there with my other half. Many times I opened up and spoke my mind on something that I wasn't pleased with or downright angry with, and got a response of "oh, well, don't worry about that happening cuz I just won't do ANYTHING anymore" - a total over-reaction that is not what I was seeking with my honesty. Very frustrating.

I know that women accuse men of over-reacting all the time.  Let's just be honest, without bashing the fairer two-thirds of the plantet, that women do it too!

Wives can be awesome, funny, loving, patient, and just sometimes weird.  My wife decided to surprise me for our anniversary one year with ramps to put a car on so I could change my own oil.  I can do it myself, but I just don't like doing it.  She could tell when I opened my gift that I didn't care for the gift as I have only used them a couple of times to appease her.  She cried and told me she would never try to surprise me again.

I apologized and didn't mention it for months.  When my birthday rolled around, she was asking about what I'd like.  I told her a few things and told her that I do like her surprises (no sexual innuendo meant for your preverts there).  I also stated that I appreciated surprises more when she did something that might be a stretch of whether I would like it as long as it tied in with something that I do like.  She's bought some unique things over the years for me that had to do with Star Wars, Star Trek, our Christian beliefs.  It worked.

I can surprise her with just about anything and she loves it.  If it has something to do with Disney and especially Pooh or Beauty & The Beast, I can score a homerun.

Staybrite wrote:

alldatndensum wrote:

I totally understand.  I use a lot of humor just to keep from getting too close as I feel like a real relationship is gonna go sideways for me anyway.  At least most people like a funny guy.

Guilty/Forgiven wrote:

All of Dat wrote:

You need a place to vent without saying anything you'd regret to your wife.  This should be a safe space. 

I for one am SO thankful for CHM, for many reasons, but this is a big one. I've always felt comfortable around all of you in sharing my emotions and either crying on your shoulders or venting about something. The therapy and catharsis of getting it all out for ya'all to read has been amazing and has gotten me thru some SUPER difficult times. I really don't know what I would've even done had I not had my CHM family to turn to. 

Thanks guys, I guess we really are kind of like the island of misfit toys around here, it's great to have other odd toys to call my family.

(and yes I saw what you did with my name there G/F....very clever...now STOP IT!  )

Wait, I thought this was the Island of the Misfits.

Through The Dark Radio wrote:

Wait, I thought this was the Island of the Misfits.

Never seen that one...that isn't the official video for that song is it?

What? You mean you don't recognize Jerry Only doing the jitterbug in the background?

Through The Dark Radio wrote:

What? You mean you don't recognize Jerry Only doing the jitterbug in the background?

Oh yeah....and Glenn Danzig in the poodle skirt! 

That went very weird.

^You say that as if you're surprised...  

Glenn has always had an affinity for poodle skirts.

Black Rider wrote:

That went very weird.

kerrick wrote:

^You say that as if you're surprised...  

Through The Dark Radio wrote:

Glenn has always had an affinity for poodle skirts.

This thread has certainly taken a turn for the absurd (like many of them do around page 2). 

Not unexpected but I hadn't finished my coffee.

Through The Dark Radio wrote:

Glenn has always had an affinity for poodle skirts.

He prefers them made from real poodles, though!

alldatndensum wrote:

Through The Dark Radio wrote:

Glenn has always had an affinity for poodle skirts.

He prefers them made from real poodles, though!

But of course 

Yup. Definitely very weird.

I was intrigued by the idea of a hard rock musical that I'd never heard of so I looked into it further. It really doesn't look that bad, Staybrite. That rehearsal vid was truly awful, but then it's a rehearsal (rehearsals are often to piano so that the singers can hear themselves and everyone learns their cues). The saving grace is that there's a drum kit in the back. If you're lucky, they might actually have a band like the Broadway show did (with a drummer who can actually carry the production). Check out this promo for the Broadway production. Looks pretty a'rite (though the female lead is a bit mediocre, the male lead sounds great). Skip to 20 seconds...

As someone who appreciates the theater, I would definitely go see a high quality version of this.

Jen, I did watch that clip of the Broadway highlights video a few weeks ago when this first came up.  It does look substantially better than the rehearsal video.  Unfortunately to me it still seems like they are mocking the music (which angers me a little).  Also I have watched the movie version of the same musical and hated it.  In addition I cannot get over how much money she wasted on the tickets (pretty much the most expensive seats in the house).  I will go, and try to enjoy myself, but I can't imagine that I will leave all head-over-heels excited.  At the very least the actors are actually going to sing...and not lip-sync to a pre-recorded track...that has to be something positive doesn't it?

I agree that it seems a bit rough on her...

it's also a good opportunity to die to yourself and bring life to your her. (this is what God has been teaching me of late).

Staybrite wrote:

In addition I cannot get over how much money she wasted on the tickets (pretty much the most expensive seats in the house).

While I can understand the frustration when money is tight, I'd look at it as "my spouse is worth the best seats in the house". While I am personally too thrifty to do that I think (it'd have to be a pretty perfect play for her) I would not hold it against her if she did that for me. I bought front row seats a couple years ago but they were off to the side so actually some of the cheapest ones. It was the best of both worlds!

So the show was last night, and I am forced to eat crow.
It was amazing!  I couldn't believe how enjoyable it was.  The acting was great the singing was better than I have experienced in most rock club shows and the story was really enjoyable.  The one thing I was seriously worried about was my perception that they were going to mock the music of my youth.  But that wasn't at all the case, it seemed more like a celebration of the music.
 
To top things off we where pretty much in the show.  the front row where club tables with chairs (and we sat dead in the middle).  The remaining seats were theater style seats.  A large majority of the story takes place in a rock and roll club/bar and during several of the performances cast members would come down off the stage and wander among those tables....sometimes interacting with the audience (Stacee Jaxx almost threw up on my wife!...lol).  In the final number we had to move our stuff off the table because one of the dancers was hoisted up there to dance (thankfully they warned us when we were seated). The sound was great, the stage setting was very professional and the musicians were spot on.
 
We found out a few interesting things about the venue, one of them being that it is often used as a proving ground for musical productions to see if they will perform well on Broadway.  Also at intermission Charlotte was reading through the program only to find out that the actor/singer playing the aging club owner “Dennis Dupree” (who we both remarked was a fantastic singer...but pretty much only a passable actor)…. turns out it was Micky Thomas!  Yep the male lead singer from 80’s and 90’s act Starship (the man who recorded “We Built This City”, “Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us”, “It’s Not Over Til It’s Over”).  
 
I really enjoyed it (and yes I gave my wife a heartfelt apology).  So much that we are looking to go again.  We sat next to a young man named Fousto who’s “friend” was in the musical.  It turns out Fousto is a dancer, and will be performing at the 5th Ave Theater in June in a production of West Side Story.  We are going to try to make it to that.

(ok go ahead and whap me over the head with all the “I told you so” comments).