Dumb Kwestion #22

Hey buoys and gulls it's that time again.  Yep time for me to actually remember to post another Dumb Kwestion!

Confession time here, I have been trying to save this one until Driven and XL got a little older....but I just can't wait any longer. I am eager to see what you reprobates come up with.



Did you ever do anything bad as a kid that your parents never found out about?

Sure.  Nothing too terrible compare to other people or by man's Sin Rating but bad enough, had I gotten caught there would have been consequences.

Let's see... One time when I was about 15 or 16. It was the summer and both my parents were working so me and my younger brother were at home unsupervised. My mom had all this expensive and breakable pottery in the house. Us boys were always wrestling and beating up on each other. This one time we were wrestling in the house. My mom had this really expensive vase probably worth 2 or 3 hundred dollars on an end table in the living room. I body slammed my brother and the vase came crashing down and shattered in a million pieces. We were both like "Oh crap mom and dad are gonna kill us!"  So we made up a story that the vase was top heavy and just fell off the table. They totally bought it!

Actually, I wasn't really a bad kid.  I was sexually active in my teens, but my parents knew.  Well, my mom did, anyway.  I also did some drinking that I am pretty sure my folks new about.  Other than that, I wasn't a brawler and drugs have never interested me.  All in all, I was pretty boring and nerdy as a teen and that limited my social life.  A limited social life will keep you pretty well in check as there isn't much to do alone.

Whoa... where do I begin ? Is this a "one story" Kwestion ? Cuz I got several.

I guess the worse one (prior to an inappropriate relationship with my very young girlfriend in high school) would be the time me and a buddy were headed somewhere with my other 2 buddies behind us in their VW. This was at about 11PM and they decided to pass us on a double yellow, 2 lane - so I sped up and it turned into a drag race. We both hit speeds side by side of about 60 on a 35mph road. By the time we got to the stop sign, we could see about a half mile back, the red and blue lights lit up... we PUNCHED IT full throttle. Took several turn-offs in a residential until we flew into the parking area of a stranger's house, turned off our engine, lights, and ducked down. About 1 minute later, we saw the red and blue cop car lights slowly driving down the street with his spotlight shining in people's yards. He drove RIGHT by us... I was pretty much crying like a little baby and my friend was actually praying to God in heaven that we wouldn't get caught.
We couldn't believe it, but the cop disappeared. After 20 minutes laying low, we fired it up and very slowly drove over to the other buddy's house, where they asked us "what took you guys so long ?"

I thought for sure I was gonna lose my license and be destroyed by my Dad. But alas, to this day, they know nothing of this.

Crazy invincible teenagers... whew !

Now we just have to hope our respective parents aren't gonna read our stories on here

Let's see...

I remember racing from the next town over back home (about 8 miles) doing between 90 and 100 miles an hour...

I remember drinking... lots and lots of drinking... in fact, I remember one time waking up on a friend's aunt's stove, hungover, at about 10 AM. I went home, took a nap, ate something, took a shower and went back to the party....

I remember steaking stuff from Hardee's on jazz band trips. We stole salt n pepper shakers, napkin holders... a coule of us actually made of with Hardee's trays...

Bad words slipping out. That hasn't happened in a while so that's good.

There are things I would say, but got caught doing them. There are things I got caught doing that weren't bad but my family would not like.

Ok, here are few of the ones I'm willing to share.

I remember one time I shot the neighbor girl in the butt with my high powered BB rifle.   I was really impressed because she had to be close to 100 yards from my house but I could clearly tell that I got her.  She never saw me do it, but she told her parents, who talked to my parents, who confronted me.  Of course I denied it, and never fessed up to it.  Carrie, wherever you are, I apologize.

I also killed my mother's cactus....and not really by accident (well kind of).  It was a miniature saguaro and they take forever to grow (no more than an inch a year).  When she got it, it was only about 2-inches tall and over several years it grew to about 8-inches.  I had made this really neat miniature bow and arrow set using bamboo skeweres and I would walk around the house looking for something to shoot.  I thought for sure I would never be able to hit the cactus with it from about 10ft away but I got it on the first shot!  Then I panicked, I thought for sure she would know what I did.  I rotated the plant so that the hole faced toward the wall and over the course of several months it slowly died.  She blamed some bug or microbe for the damage but it was me.

And that's all I'm telling.

No never.

I was a very brave daughter.
O yeah I've done things they didn't like, but there's nothing I've hidden for my mom and dad.

Geez some of you guys were pretty bad! lol I don't feel so bad about my mom's vase now. But I'm still not gonna tell her.

I've told some of my other stories about sneaking onto the high school campus at 1AM and staging a chalk outline with fake blood and flares to make it look like someone was shot... and of course the name of our school, "The Yucca Valley High School Trojans" got an additional word added on the 3 foot high letters at the back of the bleachers (I'm sure you know the word from my previous telling of the story, and those who didn't hear it can guess what that word was)

But there's a couple other stories my parents still don't know about - like when me and my buddy took a can of Aqua Net and a lighter and had some pyromania fun. Unfortunately when you spray a hairspray can for a long time it begins to drip. As we were looking up at the cool Gene Simmons flames, there were drops of liquid fire hitting the messy floor below us.... we burned a hole right through my buddy's Mom's nightgown. We actually went into the back yard and buried it in a deep hole (when you're 13, the best way to hide something is to bury it - esp if you live in the desert)

We also grabbed about 8 cans of spray paint from his dad's garage and shot them with BB Guns (kids, do NOT attempt this !!) Those things exploded with awesome spinning cans that painted everything in their paths ! Some just blew up and disappeared - we'd find them several yards away in the desert shrubs.

Destructive little cusses we were.

Livna wrote:

Geez some of you guys were pretty bad! lol I don't feel so bad about my mom's vase now. But I'm still not gonna tell her.

Dude, those are only the stories we're willing to share...

xenonlion wrote:

Bad words slipping out. That hasn't happened in a while so that's good.

There are things I would say, but got caught doing them. There are things I got caught doing that weren't bad but my family would not like.

I use those words and they don't slip out... I have a different view on that...

I plead the 5th amendment.

ishmael81 wrote:

xenonlion wrote:

Bad words slipping out. That hasn't happened in a while so that's good.

There are things I would say, but got caught doing them. There are things I got caught doing that weren't bad but my family would not like.

I use those words and they don't slip out... I have a different view on that...

Ah, I have read your view on this before. It's interesting to hear different views on swears.

I did until I got married.  Single guys, a word of advice:  NEVER leave your wife and your mother alone together.  Just don't do it.  Nothing good comes out of this.

I was really a good kid except for the year before I went into 7th grade.  My sixth grade teacher was virtually deaf and I spent a good deal of time being verbally abusive to her while she was looking right at me and she had no clue.  I guess my mom still doesn't know about that. 

The thing I got ratted out on was helping give a guy a swirly at church camp that summer.

Aside from taking scoops of sugar straight out of the sugar container and into my mouth,I don't think I can think of anything. I certainly wasn't the kind of juvenile delinquent that some of you seem to be describing of yourselves.

I think I got caught every time I screwed up. I even got caught the time I put my little sister in the dryer.

Hardkore wrote:

Aside from taking scoops of sugar straight out of the sugar container and into my mouth,I don't think I can think of anything. I certainly wasn't the kind of juvenile delinquent that some of you seem to be describing of yourselves.

I've done that, too. Got caught.

Quote :

I even got caught the time I put my little sister in the dryer.

I forgot to post my little tidbit. One time, it was snowing, and I was driving with my dad (a teacher there) to school. I dropped my dad off at the front door and went to park in my parking spot. I decided to try a handbrake turn to get into the parking lot from the side road. Unfortunately, I forgot that the handbrake was effectively useless for locking the rear wheels, and I didn't slide the rear wheels out one bit. I ended up hitting the curb at maybe 5 mph with my front wheel. It was a bit embarrassing, but there was no visible damage, and no effective damage to the alignment either. To this day, I'm not sure anyone else knows.

Which reminds me, it's winter, and I'm going to be home next week… practice time!

Oh man, that could have been much worse.  Glad it wasn't.

In Canada, how old do you have to be to drive?