|
Goto page : 1, 2  |
| Author | Message |
|---|
Staybrite
Age : 40
Joined : 08 Feb 2007
Posts : 2472
Localisation : Seattle
|  Subject: Homeless  Sun May 04, 2008 6:08 pm | |
| Well, I finally gathered enough courage, and have officially terminated my church membership.
If you have a spare second it would be great if you could pray that the Staybrite family could find a good bible based church home that will preach the gospel.
Thanks
_________________
--
"One day you'll stand before God and realize it wasn't about you" |
|
  | |
Just_Sue
Age : 41
Joined : 03 Apr 2008
Posts : 60
Localisation : North Carolina
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Sun May 04, 2008 10:35 pm | |
| | prayers on the way. |
|
| | |
alldatndensum
Admin
Joined : 30 Jan 2007
Posts : 2696
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Mon May 05, 2008 7:41 am | |
| I might be too nosey, and it's fine if you tell me to mind my own business. But, what finally pushed you to leaving your church?
_________________
"When I'm with you I don't know whether I should study neurosurgery or go to see the Care Bears movie..." |
|
| | |
Just_Sue
Age : 41
Joined : 03 Apr 2008
Posts : 60
Localisation : North Carolina
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Mon May 05, 2008 7:47 am | |
| | alldatndensum wrote: | | I might be too nosey, and it's fine if you tell me to mind my own business. But, what finally pushed you to leaving your church? |
as somebody who's so completely in love with my church home and my church family that the thought of ever having to leave would break my heart, i'm curious, too. |
|
| | |
Staybrite
Age : 40
Joined : 08 Feb 2007
Posts : 2472
Localisation : Seattle
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Mon May 05, 2008 3:05 pm | |
| | alldatndensum wrote: | | I might be too nosey, and it's fine if you tell me to mind my own business. But, what finally pushed you to leaving your church? |
Ok, but it isn’t a short story so remember, you asked for it (I will try to condense it as much as possible).
I have been a Christian for about 6 years. About a year ago, I came to the realization that I had stopped growing spiritually. Worse yet, I had stopped growing spiritually several years back. I started to search the scripture and realized that I was not bearing much of the fruit of the spirit. A very sad realization.
Our church is based on a seeker friendly model, and the preacher uses topical speaking (exclusively). Keep in mind this is the only church I have known as a Christ follower. Most of our small groups involved very little in depth scripture study (no bible study classes at all), and these did not seem to help me (or my wife). I was reluctant to just leave the church because we were members, and I felt we owed an allegiance to our church body and pastor. So I took it upon myself to work on my own spiritual growth with supplemental bible reading, and on-line sermons (warning there is some really really bad theology on the internet). That is where I discovered that the “seeker friendly” model is not working for many churches, including the church that started it “Willow Creek”.
During my struggle to grow as a Christian I came to the realization that I was going to need some serious outside help. I felt that God was directing me to sever our relationship with our current church and find a church that would preach the gospel with more “spiritual meat” as it were. I have felt convicted to do this for the last 6 months, but have been hesitant for several reasons. The primary one being rather selfish: I am the sole electric guitarist in the band, and I have strong personal relationship with the band minister. I feared that leaving the church (and also the band) would effectively ruin our relationship (our wives are also very good friends). My pastor is a good man, and I believe his theology is as sound as any man I know. We are also very close with most of the members in our congregation. This was not an easy decision.
_________________
--
"One day you'll stand before God and realize it wasn't about you" |
|
| | |
alldatndensum
Admin
Joined : 30 Jan 2007
Posts : 2696
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Mon May 05, 2008 3:14 pm | |
| If you really explain to the people you are close to in the church what is going on, and they understand that you are accusing no one of wrongdoing, then I think those relationships will endure. You might not see them as frequently once you settle into another church body, but that is typically what happens when you change churches, move to a new school, change jobs, etc. But, you can leave this church with friendships intact if you are just honest as to why you feel you aren't growing spiritually.
_________________
"When I'm with you I don't know whether I should study neurosurgery or go to see the Care Bears movie..." |
|
| | |
topshot rhit
WMHD Rocksalt Show - Amplify Christ!
Joined : 30 Jan 2007
Posts : 954
Localisation : Indiana
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Mon May 05, 2008 9:20 pm | |
| Kudos to you. Most people would just stay there forever and never realize anything was wrong. However, you're correct the seeker model as normally implemented results in exactly what you've found. Churches need to provide both milk AND meat, but so few do that well. That is one reason why I attend 2 churches.
Leaving the relationships is hard. Even though there were no bitter feelings whatsoever, we've had several families leave our church and I hardly ever see them anymore. One of those was my accountability partner but we still meet weekly. That is a big reason my wife has no interest in leaving.
_________________
"If you are not concerned about your neighbor's salvation,
you should be concerned about your own." |
|
| | |
Tall Tyrion
Age : 40
Joined : 17 May 2007
Posts : 245
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Mon May 05, 2008 11:42 pm | |
| God bless you and your family, bro. 
May you find a church home that allows you to develop spiritually. |
|
| | |
Staybrite
Age : 40
Joined : 08 Feb 2007
Posts : 2472
Localisation : Seattle
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Tue May 06, 2008 2:07 am | |
| Thanks for the support all.
We have taken 3 familys aside and explained to them our reason for leaving, and they have all been very supportive. Time will tell if we can retain our relationships with them.
_________________
--
"One day you'll stand before God and realize it wasn't about you" |
|
| | |
drumdude
Age : 14
Joined : 30 Apr 2007
Posts : 528
Localisation : right behind you
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Thu May 15, 2008 9:30 am | |
| How is your search for another church going Staybrite?
_________________
"Servant of the most high" |
|
| | |
Staybrite
Age : 40
Joined : 08 Feb 2007
Posts : 2472
Localisation : Seattle
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Thu May 15, 2008 2:59 pm | |
| | drumdude wrote: | | How is your search for another church going Staybrite? |
Good question.
We gave our old church one last Sunday (as my wife and I were both in the band). So we don't officially start our search until this coming Sunday.
We have a list of nearly a dozen churches we want to visit. We plan to attend each one of them once, and them make a short list of the ones we want to go back and look a little deeper into.
We are starting at an Evangelical Free church that a coworker belongs to.
Thanks for asking dude!
_________________
--
"One day you'll stand before God and realize it wasn't about you" |
|
| | |
Tall Tyrion
Age : 40
Joined : 17 May 2007
Posts : 245
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Thu May 15, 2008 11:45 pm | |
| Wuss. 
You need to make a clean break, like a band aid. One pull, RIGHT OFF!!! 
j/k but I could not resist getting in a Seinfeld quote. Good luck, bro. |
|
| | |
Fundy
Joined : 04 May 2007
Posts : 696
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Fri May 16, 2008 2:20 am | |
| Just to encourage you, I've attended my current church since 1991, but only became a christian in 1996. (between 1991 - 1994 it was a bit off and on!) Anyway, I made a good friend in 1994 at church and we went cycling once or twice a week. In 1998 he and his family felt that the church wasn't really the one for him, and wanted a more 'lively' kind of worship. However he was very concerned that because of him leaving and the connections I had with the church that we'd stop being in contact with each other. The good thing is that even though we now don't go to the same church we still meet up pratically every week and go for a cycle over the hills around where I live. (went out yesterday, infact!) So although we attend different churches we still have a good friendship and there are no hard feelings at all.
Hope that helps, staybrite.
Fundy
_________________
For all things 'Guy Ritter' have a look here....
www.bbillett.freeserve.co.uk |
|
| | |
sabidoo
Age : 40
Joined : 28 Apr 2007
Posts : 502
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Fri May 16, 2008 2:37 pm | |
| | Tall Tyrion wrote: | Wuss.
You need to make a clean break, like a band aid. One pull, RIGHT OFF!!!
j/k but I could not resist getting in a Seinfeld quote. Good luck, bro. |
You need to stop intruding on MY space! ! ! I am supposed to be the hate-filled, sarcastic smart a$$ around here.
You have been reprimanded.... 
_________________
I refuse to have a signature line.
 |
|
| | |
Staybrite
Age : 40
Joined : 08 Feb 2007
Posts : 2472
Localisation : Seattle
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Fri May 16, 2008 3:03 pm | |
| Thanks guys, appreciate the support. Yes even you sabidoo.
_________________
--
"One day you'll stand before God and realize it wasn't about you" |
|
| | |
avdb11
Joined : 09 Feb 2007
Posts : 2510
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Fri May 16, 2008 3:16 pm | |
| Gary, I am sure God will bring you and your family to a church where you feel comfortable and can grow. Yes spiritual.
We go to an Evangelical church for almost 17 years and I still like it to be there. |
|
| | |
Staybrite
Age : 40
Joined : 08 Feb 2007
Posts : 2472
Localisation : Seattle
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Sat May 17, 2008 11:44 am | |
| Thanks sister, your words are encouraging.
_________________
--
"One day you'll stand before God and realize it wasn't about you" |
|
| | |
alldatndensum
Admin
Joined : 30 Jan 2007
Posts : 2696
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Tue Jun 17, 2008 10:03 am | |
| So are you any closer to finding a new church home, Gary?
_________________
"When I'm with you I don't know whether I should study neurosurgery or go to see the Care Bears movie..." |
|
| | |
Staybrite
Age : 40
Joined : 08 Feb 2007
Posts : 2472
Localisation : Seattle
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Tue Jun 17, 2008 2:40 pm | |
| We have visited 3 of the 5 prospects (one a few times already). We need to hit two more churches, and then start looking really hard at which ones to revisit.
As it stands now we have two really good prospects, with just some minor things we would like to change, but I don't really expect to find a church that meets absolutely everything on our wish list. I will confess that it isn't really much fun to visit new churches almost every weekend, but we are very optimistic. Thanks for asking.
_________________
--
"One day you'll stand before God and realize it wasn't about you" |
|
| | |
avdb11
Joined : 09 Feb 2007
Posts : 2510
| | Subject: Re: Homeless Tue Jun 17, 2008 3:23 pm | |
| Good to hear you are optimistic about this.
At one day you enter a church and know "this is it". |
|
| | |
|
