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 Things to Think About (or not)

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Staybrite

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PostSubject: Things to Think About (or not)   Mon May 14, 2007 9:08 pm


Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 apiece on those little bottles of Evian water? Try spelling Evian backwards: NAIVE

If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes.


Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?

If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale bread to begin with?

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?

If Fed Ex and
UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?

Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me ...they're cramming for their final exam.

If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

If a cow laughed, would milk come out of her nose? !

Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?








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sabidoo

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PostSubject: Re: Things to Think About (or not)   Tue May 15, 2007 6:21 am

Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
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Staybrite

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PostSubject: Re: Things to Think About (or not)   Tue May 15, 2007 1:29 pm

How come ratio and patio are not pronounced the same?

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rockerVu2

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PostSubject: Re: Things to Think About (or not)   Tue May 15, 2007 3:03 pm

If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
That's better than "shut up".
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MikeInFla

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PostSubject: Re: Things to Think About (or not)   Tue Mar 15, 2016 12:35 pm

Wow, 2007. Here we go!

Are eyebrows considered facial hair?

At a movie theater which arm rest is yours? 

If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help them?
Do vegetarians eat animal crackers? 

Why are there no 'B' batteries?


If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his iPod?
 
How do you handcuff a one-armed man?

When does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny?

If a kid refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest? 

If you are bald, what hair color do they put on your driver's license?

If God sneezes, what should you say? 

Is it still illegal to park next to a fire hydrant, even if your car is on fire?
 
If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile?

If a baby's leg pops out at 11:59PM but his head doesn't come out until 12:01, which day was he born on?

Do Jewish vampires still avoid crosses? 

If a mime is arrested, do they tell him he has a right to talk?
 
In the song Yankee Doodle, is he calling the horse or the feather "macaroni"?
 
Is there a time limit on fortune cookie predictions? 

If vampires can't see their reflections, why is their hair always so neat? 

Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
 
Do they have the word "dictionary" in the dictionary?

Why is it that everyone driving faster than you is considered an idiot and everyone driving slower than you is a moron?
 
Can you daydream at night?

Why do they call the little candy bars "fun sizes". Wouldn't it be more fun to eat a big one?
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Through The Dark Radio

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PostSubject: Re: Things to Think About (or not)   Tue Mar 15, 2016 2:35 pm

MikeInFla wrote:
Wow, 2007. Here we go!

. . . . 
Why are there no 'B' batteries?

Actually, that should be why are B batteries no longer made.  Or A batteries for that matter.

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Staybrite

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PostSubject: Re: Things to Think About (or not)   Tue Mar 15, 2016 4:26 pm

MikeInFla wrote:


Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
 

I used to have one of those home bread making machines that actually made a round loaf of bread...it was kind of funny.

Oh yes, way to resurrect an old thread Mike...nicely done! Laughing

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alldatndensum
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PostSubject: Re: Things to Think About (or not)   Tue Mar 15, 2016 5:25 pm

Quote :
If a baby's leg pops out at 11:59PM but his head doesn't come out until 12:01, which day was he born on?

Actually, it isn't considered a live birth until the head is through.  So, the baby is born the next day.

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xenonlion

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PostSubject: Re: Things to Think About (or not)   Tue Mar 15, 2016 6:09 pm

Why do we bake cookies and cook bacon?
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Guilty/Forgiven

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PostSubject: Re: Things to Think About (or not)   Sun Mar 27, 2016 12:10 pm

I always liked this one:

If NOTHING sticks to TEFLON
How do they get TEFLON to stick to PANS ??

Laughing
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oteis

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PostSubject: Re: Things to Think About (or not)   Sun Mar 27, 2016 12:20 pm

First of all Holland is a part of The Netherlands. It would be the same as calling the US Texas.
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alldatndensum
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PostSubject: Re: Things to Think About (or not)   Sun Mar 27, 2016 9:12 pm

oteis wrote:
First of all Holland is a part of The Netherlands. It would be the same as calling the US Texas.


I don't think that the fine folk in Texas would actually mind that!  lol!

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messiaen77

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PostSubject: Re: Things to Think About (or not)   Mon Mar 28, 2016 8:27 am

MikeInFla wrote:
Wow, 2007. Here we go!


At a movie theater which arm rest is yours? 

Both

Quote :

In the song Yankee Doodle, is he calling the horse or the feather "macaroni"?

The feather

Quote :

Why is it that everyone driving faster than you is considered an idiot and everyone driving slower than you is a moron?

I don't know, it just works out that way.

Quote :

 Why do they call the little candy bars "fun sizes". Wouldn't it be more fun to eat a big one?

I've wondered that a lot.  And whose family is the model for the "Family Size" bags of candy and chips?
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Through The Dark Radio

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PostSubject: Re: Things to Think About (or not)   Mon Mar 28, 2016 9:27 am

alldatndensum wrote:
oteis wrote:
First of all Holland is a part of The Netherlands. It would be the same as calling the US Texas.


I don't think that the fine folk in Texas would actually mind that!  lol!

You mean there's anything significant outside of Texas?  Laughing
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oteis

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PostSubject: Re: Things to Think About (or not)   Mon Mar 28, 2016 3:10 pm

Through The Dark Radio wrote:
alldatndensum wrote:
oteis wrote:
First of all Holland is a part of The Netherlands. It would be the same as calling the US Texas.


I don't think that the fine folk in Texas would actually mind that!  lol!

You mean there's anything significant outside of Texas?  Laughing
Texas is actually one of the two states i've actually been to. The other one being Oklahoma Smile
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